Perchance to Dream
by Fireskin
Summary: All great journeys begin with a single step. This one begins with a single day. She is a fighter and will fight to save the heart and soul of the man she loves. Even if he is the Dread Wolf.
1. Chapter 1

PERCHANCE TO DREAM Chapter 1

The first night she slept not at all, struggling with the phantom pain of her lost arm. The second night as well, and the healers frowned in concern for the lady Inquisitor. Healing draughts and magic had repaired what little damage _he_ had left behind (their voices nearly hissed in rage which is how she knew he was the subject of their discussion). Why did she still writhe and suffer rather than sleep?

She didn't have the words, or the desire to tell them that sleep meant dreaming. And dreaming meant a renewed pain at the empty space he would have occupied before. Pain...sharper than any knife, hotter than any pyre, an internal wail of agony and loss. She had to continue to be functional. She couldn't lose herself in that grief, so sleep was sacrificed on the altar of her broken heart.

By the third night of no sleep it was becoming clear that her cogency was suffering. She'd nearly given Josephine's noteboard to Sera (Sera had actually chortled with glee at the thought of having Josie's letters, which is what had given her warning that she was making a mistake) and Varric had begun following her like a stocky, hairy nursemaid.

"Alright Rosebud, time to do a little sorrow drowning. You and me have a date with the finest alcohol stolen from anywhere in Thedas." She'd tried to say no, but Varric had dismissed her excuses and literally dragged her (rather than to the Herald's Rest) to her own quarters.

Once there he had plied her with brandy and ribald stories until she was laughing so hard she could barely breath. Then she'd finally spoken of the pain that consumed her and the laughter was forsaken for the healing of shared tears.

Eventually the liquor caught up with the many sleepless nights and her eyes could barely stay open.

"And now my evil plot comes to fruition." The dwarf grinned as he tossed a blanket over her where she lay drowsing on the bed. "Time to sleep… perchance to dream."

He paused. "You know that was pretty good. I need to write that down." And off he bustled in the throws of the muse.

"G'nite…." She barely managed to get the words out before sleep finally claimed her.

She was surrounded by nugs.

Why nugs? She wondered silently as she turned in place to survey the faintly glowing library that surrounded her. A nug library... only in her dreams would such a thing exist.

"Because I like them. They are simple and kind."

She whirled and nearly threw herself into the arms of her friend. "COLE! I've missed you! Are you alright?"

The spirit boy smiled and awkwardly patted her back as she hugged him. "The pain lives in this place, but I am alright. Did you come to heal the pain?"

She pulled back and looked at him with a puzzled frown. "I don't think dreaming is going to heal my pain."

His voice grew as distant as his expression for a moment as he answered. "Not your pain...his. He hides his heart, until he walks this place and lets it bleed among the spirits."

"He?" Her heart moved to her throat, making the question difficult to voice, even in this dream state. "You mean, Solas?"

He nodded. "Can you find his heart?"

Her mind raced.

A new possibility springing into being. She'd saved countries. She'd played the Game and been victorious. She'd fought an army of demons. She'd slain an elder god. If she could do all those impossible things, perhaps she could save the man she loved.

"Cole, will you help me?"

"Yes."

"Can you bring him hear to me?"

"Not tonight. It will take me time to find him, and you will wake before then."

"Tomorrow night's sleep then, bring him here to me."

The boy looked at her, hope in his worried blue eyes. "Are we going to find his heart?"

"No, we're going to remind him that I _am_ his heart."


	2. Chapter 2

**Perchance to Dream Chapter 2: All great journeys begin with a single step**

She woke with her mind churning.

Against all expectation she'd found hope. Small and fleeting though it may prove to be, she was going to grab it.

He had promised war, and so she would treat it. But pitted against his military conquest would be her emotional one. A quick breakfast and then she was off to the library, stopping just long enough to grab Varric and tow him up the stairs. "Woah, there speedy! Where's the fire?" He complained but came with her anyway.

"Okay, tell me everything you know about the stone." She started grabbing what books she could find on the subject of dwarves. Then she grilled him for hours as she struggled to cross reference his input with the limited writings.

"Okay, you're channeling the Seeker here a bit much for my taste." Varric had finally leaned back with his arms folded. "What's this all about?"

She couldn't look at him as she spoke. "I'm trying to find a way to...stop...someone. Someone who can see everything ever reflected in the fade" She was afraid if she said his name it may draw the attention of spiritual spies. Varric missed very little. He would figure it out.

"And you think the dwarves are capable of that?" The laughing surprise in his voice drew an answering smile from her. "No. But he may not know that either."

She leaned forward and whispered in his ear. "And perhaps with that hook I can catch a fish."

Varric's eyes grew sharp as he contemplated her words. His rough whisper matched hers. "Well, hell, if you have a hook, I may have just the bait."

That night, she'd asked the healers for a sleeping draught, just in case. She would have to learn meditation techniques to strengthen her ability to control when and how she slept. Because she would never give up. Even if it took her entire life of dreaming.

She knew she'd fallen asleep when suddenly she'd returned to the library she'd dreamt of the night before. Nugs squealed and ran as she grabbed a book at random and seated herself out of sight of the manifesting doorway.

Would Cole be able to bring him here? As time passed she became worried. No, she would not despair. She clung to hope as desperately as she clung to the prop book in her hands.

And hope was rewarded as she heard voices approaching. Their voices.

"You must see the nugs! Dream nugs are even cuter than awake ones!"

"Nugs? You are dragging me all over the fade to see nugs?"

"More dreams should have nugs."

"Oh, for crying out..."

And there he was. His words bitten off abruptly as he saw her the same moment she saw him.

Solas. The dread wolf himself, although his dreaming self seemed more drawn and hard than the waking self she'd known.

A moment of staring. All the words they would never say to each other hung in that dream space for the time of a heartbeat. Or perhaps it was forever.

And then he turned to leave. This was the moment. The test to see if this first tactical step would work. She spoke to his back, dreaming his presence there so strongly that (hopefully) he couldn't just walk away before he heard her.

"You will lose without the durgen'len."

The statement took him by surprise and he almost turned back toward her. At the last moment he remembered himself and took another step towards the fade door.

"You will lose without information I can give you. Will the Dread General risk his coup on a lack of information?"

"This is a ploy. We both know it. And we both know that it can't work. That it will harm you further if I stay, ma vhenan."

"Do we?" She didn't specify which statement of his she questioned. Instead she continued with her pitch. "What if I could take you in dreaming to a titan? To the very stone itself to learn of it?"

A moment as his fists clenched and unclenched. Would it work?

Finally he turned to look at her, curiosity warring with pain in his face. She smiled mischievously at him. "But there is a price, emma lath.

He quirked an eyebrow at her. Curiosity moving him past the pain. "And what is this price?"

"Sa'vunin."

"A single day...here?"

She nodded. "That is my price."

Silence.

She didn't glance at him, she couldn't as fear that he would leave nearly stopped her heart. Don't show him the pain, she silently warned herself.

Instead, she casually waved her dream hand and summoned dream wine to the small table that sat between the chairs. As she poured it into the two suddenly appearing glasses, she laid the book she'd been holding on the table near them. 1001 Nug jokes the cover said.

More silence, and then a deeply held sigh followed by a barely existent laugh.

"Why would anyone want to know 1001 nug jokes?" He muttered as he lowered himself into the chair opposite her.

"I would." Cole spoke from behind them both, bringing more surprised laughter.

As she handed Solas his glass and opened the book, she thought to herself. One night down. Perhaps a thousand and one more before he understands.

But first there is this one night.


	3. Not really a chapter

8/9/2016 Not really a chapter. This is heavy movie filming time as an actor and I have a troublesome film project in post production. Nothing is abandoned. Just a heads up that I likely won't be posting for a couple more weeks until after we make our Sundance film festival submission.


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